According to NBC News, “Robots can learn to hold knives — and not stab humans.” The Guys have only one word to respond to today’s Headline of the Day: unlikely.
What? You had a stronger word? It’s plausible that robots might not stab humans just because they’re holding knives. They could merely slice, eviscerate, decapitate, or puncture humans.
Cornell University robot developers devised a new training method that simplifies the robot training process so that you don’t need 10 advanced degrees to tell Data that you prefer your sandwiches cut diagonally, not straight across. Among the sample tasks was teaching a cashier robot not to stab people with the knives it was ringing up.
And you know what the next step will be: putting all those human cashiers out of work who can’t ring up a Ginsu without tempering the blade in customer guts. To which we say, those sociopaths have to eat, too, Cornell, and you just dook deir jorbs.
